🕊️ Are You in a Cult?

By Kristin Cambron Steele | Mindful Motions Dallas – The Neighborhood Flow

Far North Dallas

Throughout history, cults have existed in many forms — religious, political, and social. From headline-grabbing groups to smaller, secretive organizations, they share common traits: charismatic leaders, rigid rules, and intense pressure to conform. The damage they leave behind can be profound: individuals often lose a sense of autonomy, experience estrangement from loved ones, and suffer long-term emotional and psychological consequences.

While some cults make headlines, the subtler versions lurk everywhere — even in groups that first appear exciting and uplifting. Your religious organization, wellness community, or coaching program might seem harmless, but when praise is conditional, rest is frowned upon, or conformity is rewarded over curiosity, control hides behind smiles and good intentions. MLM schemes, high-pressure business circles, or “life-changing” programs exploit ambition and fear the same way, quietly shaping your choices without your awareness. They’re insidious, pervasive, and far more common than most people would dare admit.

There is not an obvious sign.

Before you scroll past, take a breath. This isn’t about robes, chants, or hidden compounds. It’s about something that can creep into your life without warning. If it were obvious what was happening, no one would join. Belonging can start as support, inspiration, or opportunity — but slowly, it can morph into control.

My Story: How I Got Sucked In

The week before I graduated from college, I joined Granton Marketing. On paper, it seemed professional, legitimate, a bridge into the “real world.” Before I knew it, I was sucked in. They asked me to miss my college graduation to work on a Saturday morning. We were expected at work by 7 a.m., seven days a week, finishing after 9 p.m. most days — Sundays, 2 p.m. or later.

I didn’t make minimum wage. But I craved belonging. It was what I needed to do to provide for myself and prove I could survive in the real world. Exhaustion became the norm. I found myself in various dangerous situations. Friends warned me, but I couldn't hear them. I moved with the group from Colorado Springs to Houston. Looking back, it’s a huge regret — a story of ambition, fear of failure, and the power of belonging.

Reflection Prompt: Can you recall a time when a group or job demanded more from you than you could reasonably give — and you felt trapped by belonging? Write it down for deeper understanding.

Sometimes it begins subtly… Then Becomes Insidious

A church that encourages daily involvement and monitors your behaviors. A yoga or wellness community that judges your worth by how strictly you follow their rules, rituals, or teachings. A business or social group that isolates you from friends and family, cloaking pressure and control as “growth” or “success.”

Even organizations that seem caring can quietly manipulate, control, and exploit, shaping your choices and your sense of self without your conscious awareness.

Pause & Reflect: Notice the language used in your group — do people answer questions with genuine thought, or does everyone give the same rehearsed response? Do you get the sense that everyone is “speaking the same language”?

Every day, “Cults” We May NOT Recognize

Not all cults have leaders. Some wear the disguise of culture:

• Hustle Culture: It tells you rest is weakness, and your worth equals your output.

• Diet Culture: Promises peace through perfection, keeping you chasing an ever-moving goal.

• Toxic Positivity: Silences pain and calls it gratitude.

• Yoga or Wellness Culture: Measures spirituality by flexibility, plant-based diet, or serene Instagram posts.

• Business Cults: Prey on ambition, fear of failure, or financial insecurity — like my own experience in sales right out of college.

• Coaching Culture: Places that promise transformation, enlightenment, or success, but subtly pressure you to conform to the coach’s “vision” or methods, often demanding time, money, or loyalty beyond what is healthy.

  
  

Even good things — faith, community, mindfulness, coaching — can become distorted when curiosity turns into control.

Reflection Prompt: How do you know if a group you belong to encourages growth or enforces compliance? What does that feel like in your body?

Hallmark Signs of a Cult-Like Group

Here are key red flags to watch for in any organization, community, or culture:

1. Uniform Language & Thought – Everyone uses the same phrases or slogans. Questions are answered with rehearsed responses rather than genuine thought.

2. Pressure to Isolate – You’re subtly or overtly encouraged to distance yourself from friends, family, or outside influences.

3. Excessive Time & Energy Demands – Obligations extend far beyond normal expectations — early mornings, late nights, constant activity.

4. Obedience Over Autonomy – Compliance is praised more than independent thinking or authentic expression.

5. Shaming & Guilt – Missing meetings, rituals, or tasks triggers guilt, anxiety, or fear of judgment.

6. Fear of Criticism or Dissent – Questions or challenges are subtly dismissed, punished, or socially penalized.

7. Exclusive Ideology – The group claims it has the only “correct” answers; outsiders are dismissed or viewed as inferior.

8. Emotional Manipulation – Praise, attention, or approval is used as a tool to control behavior.

9. Rapid Commitment – New members are asked to make major life changes before fully evaluating the group.

10. Vague or Shifting Rules – Expectations are unclear, constantly changing, or inconsistently applied, keeping members off-balance.

Reflection Prompt: As you read these, which ones feel familiar in your own communities — at work, school, or wellness spaces? How did noticing them make you feel in your body?

Questions to Ask Yourself

If you’re unsure whether a group or community — spiritual, professional, wellness, or coaching-based — is nurturing or narrowing your world, pause and ask:

1. Does this group invite me to think and feel for myself, or discourage questions?

2. Are my relationships with family and friends outside the group supported — or viewed as distractions?

3. Do I feel anxious, guilty, or “less than” when I miss a meeting, class, or practice?

4. Is rest honored here, or replaced by constant activity and obligation?

5. Am I praised for authenticity or for obedience?

6. Does belonging require secrecy, separation, or self-doubt?

7. How do I feel in my body when I engage with this group — tension, ease, or dread?

Journaling Prompt: Pick two of these questions and write freely for 5 minutes. Let your answers come naturally.

Returning to Your Own Wisdom

Awakening doesn’t mean rejecting everything. It means noticing what is truly healthy for you and honoring what does. Yoga teaches us to return home — to our breath, our body, and our inner knowing.

You can still love the rituals, teachings, or people that once shaped you and simultaneously decide your growth requires space. Belonging should feel like freedom and growth, not fear and stagnation.

Action Prompt: Take 5 minutes today to pause, breathe, and notice where your energy goes. Which connections feel nourishing? Which feel depleting?

If this resonates, tag a friend or colleague who might need to see this. Share your story, your reflections, or even this post. Communities thrive when people talk about their experiences and boundaries.

Recognizing these patterns is not about fear — it is about self-care and reclaiming your autonomy. True belonging supports growth, curiosity, and connection without demanding you sacrifice your well-being or conform to someone else’s agenda. The next step is learning how to find and nurture communities that encourage freedom, authenticity, and mutual support — spaces where your needs, boundaries, and individuality are honored, rather than being overshadowed by the group’s or the leader's needs, wants, and desires.

Finding Healthy Communities: Steps for Connection Without Control

Belonging should feel nourishing, not depleting. Here are practical ways to identify and engage with communities that honor your individuality while fostering connection:

1. Check for Respectful Boundaries

   • Healthy groups honor your personal time, commitments, and limits. You should feel comfortable saying “no” without guilt or pressure.

2. Notice the Language and Energy

   • Pay attention to how members communicate. Are questions welcomed? Is disagreement tolerated? Do people speak authentically, or is everyone repeating

     the same rehearsed phrases?

3. Seek Reciprocity, Not Obligation

   • Communities that thrive are mutual — support flows both ways. Avoid spaces where your energy or resources are exploited for someone else’s goals.

     

4. Look for Encouragement, Not Obedience

   • Leaders or influential members should inspire curiosity, learning, and personal growth, rather than demanding strict compliance.

5. Observe How Rest and Reflection Are Treated

   • Healthy groups encourage balance. You should be able to take breaks, reflect, and step back without fear of judgment or exclusion.

     

6. Prioritize Shared Values Over Rituals

   • Focus on communities that align with your core values, rather than groups that require strict adherence to rules, rituals, or lifestyles.

7. Start Small and Test the Waters

   • Engage gradually. Attend a few meetings, classes, or events before fully committing. Notice how you feel physically, mentally, and emotionally after each interaction.

8. Check in With Yourself Regularly

   • Periodically reflect: “Does this community energize me, or drain me?” Journaling or mindful reflection can help you assess alignment over time.

Reflection Prompt: Identify one community you belong to currently. Which of these steps are being honored? Where do you feel tension or restriction? How might you shift your engagement to feel freer and more supported?

With care,

Steele

Studio Owner & Clinical Mental Health Counseling Student

Mindful Motions Yoga

The Neighbor

hood Flow